What an excellent, accessible write up. Straight to the heart, as usual. Though I am surprised to learn SH had a fear of public speaking, I am not at all surprised he’d offer such elegant wisdom about it to the reader. Thank you Sam! Now I understand the tour schedule much more.
I'm a retired (mostly) criminal defense attorney who hates public speaking. Lots of great advice in this piece, of course. One I want to highlight is to absolutely speak out loud when you're writing and reviewing your speech/presentation. Lots of material that looks solid on paper doesn't sound nearly as good when spoken. Also, even if you're not memorizing your speech, memorize your transitions; know exactly how you're getting from one idea to the next.
I guarantee I was more fearful of public speaking than anyone on Earth. I no longer am. I sincerely believe the only difference between myself then and now is that I was forced to do it again and again, over and over again. Anyone forced the way I was eventually learns how to get over their own very idiosyncratic humps.
You just have to accept your fears, as Sam says, and then just keep doing it and doing it and doing it.
I was so terrified of public speaking that I failed several courses in speech classes in college. I finally took a speech class at our local junior college and the instructor said it was better to use flash cards to keep you on track than to actually memorize the words but concentrate on your material and look at your audience and try to speak to them. I found that I was very surprised and the audience was more interested in what I had to say. If I was losing them I knew it and it helped. I would still get nervous but it would fade after I got started and it was very rewarding.
Thank you very much for sharing your own experiences.
A simple piece of advice completely changed my feeling and attitude about public speaking. That was to arrive early and simply spend some time getting to know a few of the members of the audience. Then, when you step up to speak, it is not a huge crowd of strangers, but rather, a few faces and names and personalities that that you have personally gotten to know a bit, and are warm and welcoming. For me, this has changed the act of public speaking from something that I was terrified of and avoided, to something that I now enjoy.
Yes ive found that too - have a chat to few people beforehand relaxes me and ii feel less like its 'me and them' separate, and more like its more 'us together' one.
Jerry Seinfeld pointed out that the number one fear, according to surveys, is public speaking. Number two? Death. He then quipped that by that logic, most people would prefer to be in the box rather than delivering the eulogy at a funeral. I will add from personal experience that being nervous before you appear in public (whatever the setting) is a good sign! It means you give a shit about what you're doing. For most, the fear dissipates quickly once they have taken the stage.
I'd rather be Huck Finn, hiding in the rafters! It's true though, especially post-psychedelics I don't really have any fear of death, (though the process could be bad). If I could trip my way to public speaking mastery, I'd be set! Instead I made a mid-life career change that requires it, so I'll be learning the hard way...
It would be fantastic to have Sam write more like this on a regular basis - to take a topic outside of politics, for example, and to do a deep dive that results in tangible take-aways for us readers. Sam is such a wealth if knowledge that I’m sure this same format can be used on many other areas of daily life.
I’d also add best to avoid the old trope “just imagine everyone in the audience is naked”. I tried it once and in the front row was a very large (overweight) sweaty man in tight ill-fitted attire. I couldn’t get the image out of my mind of him…well…naked. It rocked me to the point of it not being able to focus on anything other than him staring at me without pants. I battled through it and delivered a worthwhile speech but the supposed time-tested strategy was a hard fail.
As I am about to launch into social media to promote my book, I just want to say thank you! I am scared to make the videos, but I must if I want to help the people. You made several key points I will remember: they want you to succeed, you don't look as nervous as you feel, and practice!
PS brought my daughter to Seattle to see you speak. It was the highlight of our weekend away.
This is brilliant - thank you for sharing and providing a way through the fear. I will be sharing with colleagues who also view public speaking as a personal existential threat. For me, despite (slightly accidentally) having roles my entire professional life that have required me to speak in front of an 'audience' (as a teacher, a barrister, a university academic, and CEO) I find the anxiety remains (and I still over-prepare, still get anxious, still rely on notes). However, I *have* got better at hiding all of the fears!
This couldn't have come at a better time. I'm delivering a guest lecture at your alma mater next week and am in a frantic mess trying to rehearse and rewrite this thing. Your tips are priceless. Thank you!
Good advice - I had no idea you were afraid of public speaking (although I do recall a young Sam Harris being chastened when corrected by Hitch during a 4 horsemen conversation.)
My solution was to join a business breakfast group in which I was compelled to contribute a short tip or lead every week. The fear disappeared through compulsory practice. Finally, as I am a comedian at heart, I visualize my audience laughing at my jokes,
I’d love to leave a comment but I’m terrified that people will be reading it.
Lol!
👀
🤛🏻
😂👍🏼
Hah! Post pangs!
What an excellent, accessible write up. Straight to the heart, as usual. Though I am surprised to learn SH had a fear of public speaking, I am not at all surprised he’d offer such elegant wisdom about it to the reader. Thank you Sam! Now I understand the tour schedule much more.
I'm a retired (mostly) criminal defense attorney who hates public speaking. Lots of great advice in this piece, of course. One I want to highlight is to absolutely speak out loud when you're writing and reviewing your speech/presentation. Lots of material that looks solid on paper doesn't sound nearly as good when spoken. Also, even if you're not memorizing your speech, memorize your transitions; know exactly how you're getting from one idea to the next.
Transitions... Pro tip right there. Thnx
I guarantee I was more fearful of public speaking than anyone on Earth. I no longer am. I sincerely believe the only difference between myself then and now is that I was forced to do it again and again, over and over again. Anyone forced the way I was eventually learns how to get over their own very idiosyncratic humps.
You just have to accept your fears, as Sam says, and then just keep doing it and doing it and doing it.
'get over their idiosyncratic humps' is a lovely sentiment thank you for reiterating it so eloquently.
I was so terrified of public speaking that I failed several courses in speech classes in college. I finally took a speech class at our local junior college and the instructor said it was better to use flash cards to keep you on track than to actually memorize the words but concentrate on your material and look at your audience and try to speak to them. I found that I was very surprised and the audience was more interested in what I had to say. If I was losing them I knew it and it helped. I would still get nervous but it would fade after I got started and it was very rewarding.
Thank you very much for sharing your own experiences.
Using a VR headset with a public speaking app can do wonders to replicate the feeling of having all eyes on you.
Interesting Lisa, good use for VR. Its the imagery of the eyes on you that can stop you starting. What a good way to normalise that first stage.
rt
A simple piece of advice completely changed my feeling and attitude about public speaking. That was to arrive early and simply spend some time getting to know a few of the members of the audience. Then, when you step up to speak, it is not a huge crowd of strangers, but rather, a few faces and names and personalities that that you have personally gotten to know a bit, and are warm and welcoming. For me, this has changed the act of public speaking from something that I was terrified of and avoided, to something that I now enjoy.
Yes ive found that too - have a chat to few people beforehand relaxes me and ii feel less like its 'me and them' separate, and more like its more 'us together' one.
Jerry Seinfeld pointed out that the number one fear, according to surveys, is public speaking. Number two? Death. He then quipped that by that logic, most people would prefer to be in the box rather than delivering the eulogy at a funeral. I will add from personal experience that being nervous before you appear in public (whatever the setting) is a good sign! It means you give a shit about what you're doing. For most, the fear dissipates quickly once they have taken the stage.
Imagine giving your own eulogy. Double whammy.
or if new millennial, create a playlist for it.
I'd rather be Huck Finn, hiding in the rafters! It's true though, especially post-psychedelics I don't really have any fear of death, (though the process could be bad). If I could trip my way to public speaking mastery, I'd be set! Instead I made a mid-life career change that requires it, so I'll be learning the hard way...
It would be fantastic to have Sam write more like this on a regular basis - to take a topic outside of politics, for example, and to do a deep dive that results in tangible take-aways for us readers. Sam is such a wealth if knowledge that I’m sure this same format can be used on many other areas of daily life.
I’d also add best to avoid the old trope “just imagine everyone in the audience is naked”. I tried it once and in the front row was a very large (overweight) sweaty man in tight ill-fitted attire. I couldn’t get the image out of my mind of him…well…naked. It rocked me to the point of it not being able to focus on anything other than him staring at me without pants. I battled through it and delivered a worthwhile speech but the supposed time-tested strategy was a hard fail.
As I am about to launch into social media to promote my book, I just want to say thank you! I am scared to make the videos, but I must if I want to help the people. You made several key points I will remember: they want you to succeed, you don't look as nervous as you feel, and practice!
PS brought my daughter to Seattle to see you speak. It was the highlight of our weekend away.
I was at that talk as well!
Thanks for sending this Sam. I’m now going to work on my fear of public speaking instead of avoiding it like the plague.
I'd rather just give into the plague.
This is brilliant - thank you for sharing and providing a way through the fear. I will be sharing with colleagues who also view public speaking as a personal existential threat. For me, despite (slightly accidentally) having roles my entire professional life that have required me to speak in front of an 'audience' (as a teacher, a barrister, a university academic, and CEO) I find the anxiety remains (and I still over-prepare, still get anxious, still rely on notes). However, I *have* got better at hiding all of the fears!
Beautiful and comforting thoughts Sam. Thank you for sharing.
I have found the key to enjoying public speaking is preparedness. Once you are comfortable, there is nothing to fear. It is “showtime.”
This couldn't have come at a better time. I'm delivering a guest lecture at your alma mater next week and am in a frantic mess trying to rehearse and rewrite this thing. Your tips are priceless. Thank you!
Good advice - I had no idea you were afraid of public speaking (although I do recall a young Sam Harris being chastened when corrected by Hitch during a 4 horsemen conversation.)
My solution was to join a business breakfast group in which I was compelled to contribute a short tip or lead every week. The fear disappeared through compulsory practice. Finally, as I am a comedian at heart, I visualize my audience laughing at my jokes,